1/18-The Spoils Of Babylon “Kicking The Habit”-IFC
-This show is so fucking bizarre, you guys. It’s a spoof of all those 70s and 80s mini series events like The Thorn Birds and it is hysterical. Will Ferrell plays Babylon scribe Eric Jonrosh and he narrates us through this ludicrous love story starring Tobey Maguire, Kristen Wiig, Tim Robbins and Haley Joel Osment to name a few of the heavy hitters.
-Haley Joel Osment didn’t grow up awkward looking at all. Not at all.
-Kristen Wiig is in love with Tobey Maguire, her brother. However he brought home a new love from the war. That role is being played straight. By a Mannequin.
-haha, I was unaware that I would need 3D glasses for the scene in which Wiig’s character burns the mannequin alive. “The fire! It’s coming right at me!”
-Tobey decides that it is now his plight to wander the earth with this burnt mannequin head.
-Also, as if this thing weren’t star studded enough, the mannequin was voiced by Carey Mulligan. How’d they rope that frail, humorless thing into this?
-Cynthia seeks out Devon and finds him strung out on heroin as a Jim Morrison-esque poet. He vows to kick the habit and what follws is a silly ass detox montage shot in both a film noir style and a 70s drug flick style. This bit goes on far too long for my liking.
-Tim Robbins as the Morehouse patriarch is probably my favorite part of this show. He’s hilarious, especially here as he is losing control of his mental faculties and keeps whacking Devon repeatedly with his cane.
1/22-Live with Kelly and Michael-NBC
-Joined In progress as I didn’t feel in the mood for their banter
-I was in the mood for Michael B. Jordan, however. aka Wallace from The Wire and Vince Howard from Friday Night Lights, but most recently his rave reviews for Fruitvale Station, which I’ve seen and he was phenomenal. Love this guy.
-He and Kelly are both All My Children alumni. Humble beginnings, indeed.
-He’s starring in his first comedy, That Awkward Moment, because he dies a lot onscreen and wanted to make it to the third act finally. haha.
-Now they have some doctor there to give heart health tips and I swear to god, Michael curtsied for this fuckin guy.
-Yeah, I don’t even watch my sports news shows in a timely manner. I know, I know.
-Bloomingdale’s has commissioned 48 different “stylish” football helmets in conjunction with the Superbowl and oh man, are they ugly. Flowers, beads, spikes, a panda bear. Nope.
-Keith misses the old Jim Thorpe era leather earflap helmets. But you know, concussions.
-Still talking about this Peyton Manning Omaha shit. As a hardcore Giants fan, I can tell you that Peyton’s little brother has been using that hard count for years. Where’s Eli’s Omaha Steaks offer?
-Will Peyton Manning overcome his Brady demons? Spoiler alert: yep.
-Hawks-Nets in London. Paul McCartney is there and Joe Johnson freaks out and starts going beast mode all over his old team
-Who the fuck is guarding Johnson? 26 points in the first half. God damn.
-Rex Ryan has the most New York Jet playoff wins in team history. yikes. how depressing must that be for Jet fans?